Feeling Well but not looking it

I cannot figure out why I feel good but I keep looking ill.  A year ago I had finished radiation and looked the best ever.  Maybe the radiation just hastened my aging process, after all I will be 65 in July. But I look in the mirror and can't even connect my face now to the me about six months ago when we last visited North Carolina.  Now I have other friends who have had radiation treatments and I do see the difference in their looks and face.  But it depends on where the radiation was.  If it was to the head or chest, then it affects their looks. But if it is radiation to the lower body, the face seems to be spared, but the internal organs are wrecked.  Long term effects of scar tissue, and damage can require surgery as many of my friends have had. It may take ten years, but radiation for colon cancer and breast cancer can leave long term side effects.  So, I guess I will learn to live with my new looks.  And try not to be so vain and age more gracefully.  I am on my laptop this morning so I can add more photographs from the other day.  Less than two weeks and we will be on our way to the mountains and visiting our grandbaby in Pensacola, Florida. I am ready. I am a person who is part gypsy.  We used to move every 5 to 10 years with Ralph's career field with IBM.  I miss that.  I don't enjoy staying in one place. I also love traveling.  Ralph not so much.  Reading the newspaper is dismal and depressing.  It reminds me of my grandmother's life, during the Great Depression, no money,  banks empty.  Grandma raised chickens for eggs and took in sewing.  Grandpa was a sheet metal worker and traveled to make cash.  They lived from hand to mouth.  But no one went hungry.  If before July our government does not deal with our debt, and defaults, you will see banks fail.  Retirement 401 K's will no longer be backed, even social security will be gone.  We realize now we should have gotten the farm last year.  At least if you have water on your property,  wood, and chickens and gardens.  You will eat.  You will have heat.  I hope our nation does not come to that. But it could happen.  I pray not.  For my grandchildren's sake.

Bluebirds.

I have bluebirds.  A house full of baby bluebirds.  I am so in love.  I put out mealworms for the parents. They appreciate the help in feeding.  The house next to the bluebird house has baby chickadee's.  Sometimes the father bluebird gets mixed up and tries to go into the wrong house. And then there is chaos. And a lot of chickadee shrilling and flapping of wings. I will try and get one of my bluebird photographs off of my facebook. I hate that all my photographs are on my laptop and never on this desktop.  We are going to leave May 7th for Murphy North Carolina (where we were for weeks last Oct looking for our farmhouse) But this time we are not coming back until we bought the farm, so to speak.   I may never come back at all. I am sick of no seasons in Florida, sick of heat, sick of no lilac's.  Can't even bring myself to plant zinnia's this year.  But I see some things like my purple cone flowers coming back anyway.  We had flocks of catbirds and Cedar Waxwings stripping our mulberry tree's.  My goal on our new farm is to plant way more stuff the birds eat naturally and buy much less sunflower seed.  I may even grow sunflowers commercially because the price at the store has skyrocketed.  I don't know what's going on.  But I need stock in black oil sunflower seeds.  So off  to farmhouse searching we go.  I had my two year followup with the radiologist in Tampa.  So far, so good. He said, "I think that after two years, you are out of the woods."  But I just live one day at a time and thankful for it.  Hope when we get settled in Murphy camping I will have more time for updating this poor blog.  Later.